Today it has been exactly a year since my grandfather passed away. No-one ever expected him to pass way. He still seemed so healthy, happy and busy. No, it came unexpected to everyone. All of the sudden I had lost someone who I loved dearly. Right until this very I can’t recall any day being harder than this particular day. So today I’d like to take a moment to stand still by a great man who I miss every single day.
Throughout the first twenty three years of my life, my grandfather played an important part. He truly was like a second father. He took his car and brought me to school when rain was pouring down. He was there to come pick me up when it was pouring rain as well. He helped me learn to ride my bike, drove me to wherever I needed to go, and came pick me up for sleepovers, talked to me about football and so much more. It leaves a huge gab not having him around anymore. He was also there when I learned to swim, when I went to school for the first time. He was also there went from elementary school to high school, when I got graduated, when I got my driver’s license and every birthday I ever celebrated. Since last year, every new landmark will be celebrated without him. That pains me.
As my grandmother is struggling as well, I got to see her yesterday. Like I go to see her every Monday. Today, I didn’t go to see her, mainly as I knew my mom would be with her today. So I thought it would be best to divide the attention for her over the whole week. In memorial of my grandfather, I went to his grave today, for the first time since the funeral. I know that has been a long time, but I found it just so hard to go there again. Being back there today brought lots of memories and tears. Still, I am happy I finally made this step, because it did good for me. It was nice to just be there all by myself, with all my grief, my thoughts, memories and pain. Even though, it hurt me a lot.